Job Rejection Gifts

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

'Trubshaw, your application for the serious crime squad has been rejected!'

'I'm sorry, Bennett; but we gave the job to O'Toole. You have the know-how, but he had the know-who.'

"I take it that's a no?"

'Sorry, but I don't think you're right for our company.'

'Did you get the promotion?'

worker rejects promotion to protect deniability

"Have you considered applying for a job a million mils from here?"

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'Manager. . . Commander. . . Chieftain. . . King!'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

'The lads at the office still talk about the day you told the boss what to do with his job...'

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

"We're looking for that perfect blend of vision, ambition and ethical ambiguity."

'I'm promoting you to project coordinator because you seem to have an overall view of things.'

"It used to Casual Friday. Now it's Furlough Friday."

Very Difficult Conversations

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

'It's a lateral move, you'll now be getting all of Kramer's work too.'

'Upset at you for breaching the non-compete? Of course not.'

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

'I had a thought. Let's scrap everything and start a new fiscal year right now.'

'A computer is only as good as the people who are employed to replace the people who were made redundant by the computer.'

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

The number one injury in today's workplace: severe bends caused by repeated exposure to deep-dive presentations.

"Tell the vice presidents they've downsized enough."

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"Ron didn't realise he was so popular."

'Let's keep in mind that although quitters never win, they often manage to avoid litigation.'

We're looking for someone who knows how to adapt, not adopt.