Job Negotiations Pillows

'I appreciate the new title, Mr Boyle, but what I could really use is a raise.'

"Instead of jumping, how'd you like to join the bridge workers union?"

"You look perfectly suited for managing on the pittance of a salary that goes with the job!"

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"I've never said this to a woman before, but here goes: We're not paying you enough."

'Salaries Manager. No.'

The Evolution of the Bonus

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

'We'd like to pay you what you're worth, too, Fenstrom. Unfortunately we must conform to the minimum wage law.'

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

'No thanks, I don't drink when I'm driving home a point about investing.'

'Foster's here, regarding his raise sir. Shall I have him crawl in now, or let him sweat a while?'

"Is this about your raise?"

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

"I hear the Universe is expanding - set up a meeting with their people."

"To be clear you are willing to labor under misconceptions?"

'Was my salary expectation a bit too high?'

'I might give you the benefit of the doubt. But I doubt it.'

Boy sits at father's desk at work and says on phone: 'OK, I'll have my boys call your boys ..'

'You've been with the company for 20 years Harvey, you make an excellent wage, get 4 weeks paid vacation... I'm going to have to let you go.'

'What would you say to a salary increase?'

'You may have three mergers.'

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

'I always feel at the end of the day I could've taken credit for more.'

"Do you handle employee salary negotiations as well?"

"Can you believe those guys? We tell them absolutely, positively no further negotiations, and they stop negotiating!"

"My loophole out-loopholes your loophole."

"I'm Mr. Trump's attorney and this is my attorney. Once his attorney arrives, we can begin."

"Say what you will about Donald Trump, he's one helluva negotiator."

"Something about this proposed merger with Wickery Basket Company makes me nervous."

"He'll see you now, but I should warn you � he secretly despises you."

" 'Take over' is such a harsh term. We prefer corporate make over.' "

'So to sum up this lengthy discussion: at the next meeting we'd prefer one platter of Brie and grape, one of honey glazed ham, and one of roast beef with wild horseradish - and NO cheese and pickle.'

"To avoid trouble, I've brought in a troubleshooter."