Job Market Ponderer Gifts

"But I do have a job, sir - this!"

'Louie Ferguson got a job last week -- you never know who's going to be next.'

"We need help to meet the demand for more help wanted signs."

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

"He's having a hard time finding work."

The Three Wise Queens

"And where have you previously moused?"

'I'm afraid you don't have the leadership qualities we're seeking.'

'Do you do self-deprecating humour?'

Between Offices

"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."

'Yes I'm sure we can find an opening for you, Mr Smith!'

"I thought about looking for work in England, but I hear they're capping bonuses."

Bubble; 'This castle manager job better be for real.'

"I'm looking for a position in a less competitive market."

Impressive qualifications, but seeing as how I'm trying to fill the position I just fired you from...

Bank P45's - 'Cashier number 5 please.'

"You’d think being anthropomorphic would be enough but nowadays you need a Masters to even get your foot in the door."

"Yes, I can use tools, but I realized early on I could earn more money as an accountant..."

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

Opp'y of a Lifetime

"She said that she's against combing marriage with a career....so I quit my job."

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

"I know you used to be our paperboy. That's why when you leave, you'll find your resume on the roof."

'Miss Peterson will be with you as soon as she goes through a few other resumes.'

'Are you free at the moment?'

Now hiring.

'You will have no hope of recognition or advancement. That's why you'll be underpaid.'

'Maybe we should have been a bit more specific in the ad...'

'I see an applicant being hired!'

"It has come to my attention that you may have been somewhat less than forthcoming in your résumé."

"I guess I'll see you around Frank."

'It's nice but will it be a hedge against inflation.'

"Your curriculum vitae is extremely detailed, isn't it? I don't quite know what to make of the fact that your third-grade teacher, Miss Hartley, made you stand in the corner for throwing an eraser although another kid did it."