Job Interview Admirer Pillows

'Can you Type?'

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

'I'm afraid you don't have the leadership qualities we're seeking.'

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

Robocop and Juliet.

"So what makes you think you're qualified for this job?"

"I've told you why I need a dog. Now suppose you tell me what makes you think you might be that dog."

"Don't get the wrong idea about those years in a mental institution. I was employed there."

'I believe in a 'carrot and stick' approach to motivation. The carrot is not to use the stick.'

'I'm afraid that the top investment banks are looking for more from job applicants than a 'Top Degree from the University of Hard Knocks'.'

"I see by your resume that you're having trouble finding work because you pad your resume."

'If you take this job, you will need child care... that's my second job.'

'We like your style, but hate your substance.'

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

"You inhabit the body of someone who has an impressive résumé."

Robot walking pet robot

The state off graduates literacy levels is shoking and both my coleegues agree that there maths isn't much better!

'So what are your ambitions?'

'Once I got the cold fusion problem out of the way, the rest was easy!'

"Your answers sound rehearsed."

"What other skills do you obtain other than being able to answer interview questions?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Actually, I was thinking more in terms of a temporary position.'

"I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, will do my job, and has no interest in having my job."

"This next song is about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

'All I did was to connect an artificial heart to artificial legs, to an artificial kidney, to...'

"I see you have extensive wood chuckery experience."

"Where do you see yourself in five years? Haha, just kidding!"

"You may have heard some very slanderous rumours about this company."

Men discussing a book on a chat show