Job Celebration Gifts

After party at the spill club.

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

Man at desk with two in-trays reading 'urgent' and 'too late'.

'Great news, Dear! I've been traded to a think tank in California for a PhD Specializing in the Baltics!'

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

"That arrow always goes to the bottom when I walk by."

'Stop saying 'how high?' until I say 'jump'.'

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

"You weren't expecting a walrus, right?"

'I can't give you a raise, a promotion or a bigger office, but I AM going to allow you to have a personality.'

"I suggest we start with the low hanging fruit."

Not a surprise, coming from the new boss - who looks about 6 years old.

"I am dressed for the job I want."

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

The Pencil and Sharpener

i am just celebrating my 25th anniversary at novox nursery

'You say you're willing to start at the bottom...'

Help wanted. Various positions available.

"This is bad work, Edwards! Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!"

Ace headhunters.

'I was so angry, I got up and tip-toed out of the meeting. I probably should've stomped.'

"Goodbye, Cruikshank. We leave you to contemplate the wisdom of messing with big dog!"

Man leaving his office with his computer tangled around his leg,

Cog-In-The-Wheel

Our founder: Custard pies Ltd.

'As you know, some of us can't keep up with the pace of new technology.'

'Congratulations, Forester. Your ingenious scheme to cut production costs ... In anticipation of this inevitable development, we are reducing your salary.'

'Time to leave your comfort zone, Hoskins.'

"No, you can't have a raise. You didn't say, 'mother, may I'."