Jet-setting Jokers T-Shirts

"My kids are safely tucked away in the overhead bins."

'Bomb voyage Minister!'

Cow Blue Arrows

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

"It's cheaper than coach, and he gets more legroom."

'Thanks for flying in for the meeting.'

"Hell: The Airport"

"How's my tripping you up?"

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, and this is your captain siiinnngiiinnng."

'Round-the-world ticket please!' - 'One way?'

"Have you decided where to travel?"

"Good news, sir – your carry-on has been upgraded to business class."

'You are pigeon toed.'

Airline: Arrivals, Departures, Missing Luggage and Missing Planes.

Man comes through luggage collection conveyor belt at the airport.

"At least you made it into the hallway."

'When did the treadmill replace the rat race?'

Man skated through airport with rollers on pull bag.

"It's me. I was going through a 'Bon Jovi Phase.'"

"There it is again, that tapping..."

"We want to fly the friendly skies, but only with friendly fellow passengers."

'Wait, what's that on runway one?...Ok I got it, just another one of those budget carriers.'

Galley Christmas

"I'm fine. It's just...I miss the confinement."

'Your excessive weight is a too-heavy carry-on and we must charge accordingly, excessively!'

"Any chance of an upgrade?"

"Sometimes I think the captain doesn't appreciate the seriousness of military maneuvers."

'Once you're seated and have safely stowed all carry-ons, we'll start the bidding for seat belts.'

Flight nap

"With our lives it's all abut the journey. With our luggage, it's definitely about the destination."

Sydney Airport - passengers called Barry, Sheila and Skippy.

'Why isn't there zero tolerance to drugs and alcohol?'

'When you said this was a three star hotel, I didn't expect to see them through a hole in the roof!'

'I think I'll walk to work today.'

'Want to buzz the airport?'