Java Jailer Pillows

Stirrbucks

In/Out/These Things Happen.

The coffee's not working.

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

"Don't talk to me before discover coffee."

'Sorry, but we can't serve you the grande size anymore without a prescription.'

'I wanted to go straight. . . but then I learned a law degree.'

'This decaf's lousy.'

"Are bringing your new girlfriend to the office party?"

Sweet Jailbreak

"Carl! I thought I'd find you here."

"It just doesn't seem right. Ever since the new system upgrade nothing is where it used to be!"

'I'm being released on Blu-ray.'

'The hard time isn't so bad, but that community service is murder!'

'I can't believe it! -- My own personal computer turned state's evidence!'

'Sure I do bad things, but I do them in moderation.'

'-and which commandment did you break?'

'Well, the joke's on me - it turns out that the King pardoned you twelve years ago!'

'I tried to give a woman the Heimlich maneuver, and it turned out she was doing the Macarena.'

'I never saw a man who looked with such a wistful eye upon that little tent of blue which prisoners call the Sky.'

"You've got a dinner invitation."

Free the Downtown Three!

Parole officer: Hanging in and hanging out.

"Why not become a prison officer when you're released, Dobson? We need 2,000 new prison officers; the government's keen to provide employment for ex-offenders plus you know the ropes."

The Secret Formula in Coffee

'I got six months for arson, and ten years for failing to file an environmental impact statement.'

'It was sort of like a penalty for early withdrawal. The bank hadn't opened yet.'

"Congratulations. You earned time off for bad behavior."

'I'll be with you in a minute Carl. Riley's just showing me how to resize some images to Jpeg.'

Man escaping prisoner via feng shui