Jar Jouster Pillows

The sword in the all-natural impossible-to-stir peanut butter.

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"#notguilty."

"The trees are laughing at us."

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

Yawning barristers in court

A baby in court

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

Clown Wedding with Rake

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

"Dave here, is a lawyer. But don't be too impressed, he only specialises in petty crime."

"Don't talk to me before discover coffee."

'How am I going to get all this back in the tube?'

'It was more than my finest hour, Paltrow. It was my finest billable hour.'

'He started it!'

'My client has required the services of countless law enforcement, court, penal and probation personnel. He's not a menace...he's a jobs creator!'

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

Sub Post Office/Sub-Justice

'I believe in trial and error, I believe my client being brought to trial is an error.'

"'Ignorance of the law is no excuse.' Golly! I never heard that one! Did you ever hear that one?"

"I got probation."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

"Once again, I simply don't recall."

Justice