Jail Time Pillows

'This is my third conviction and I'm still not the black sheep of the family.'

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

Shakespeare in the clink

Madoff and devil.

'It's my mother. She wants to talk to you.'

Prison Romance.

Prisoner Crossing

Police Lineup Escape

Exhibition for Prisoners

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

'You can't cash your paychecks until your 6 month probation is satisfactorily over.'

"ll I was doing was following my dream...turns out that contravened the restraining order."

'Ms. Andrews, have there been any important office memos, voice-mails, texts, tweets or IMs during my incarceration?'

'The food's not too bad here. It tastes just like yours and just like yours, it also comes out of a can.'

'My biggest mistake was to make a 'death-bed confession'... then I made a full recovery!'

"Both the movie and I will be released this summer."

''Willie the Wizard' gets out next week -- get ready to change all the locks.'

Man to lady: 'Prisons are overcrowded, so we're seeing more sentences of timeout instead.'

'I mistakenly thought that 'mutual' meant the funds were equally mine to use.'

'OVERCROWDED-I'll say it's OVERCROWDED!'

'The worst case of insider trading I've ever seen.'

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

"Maximum security prison"

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

'Try to think of it as early parole.'

'You're the one who called for a locksmith?'

"The reason I never get any visitors is because all my family and friends are in here!"

'Sweetheart, your calls are slowing my early release.'

"We're so close that we're finishing each other's sentences."

"You've got a dinner invitation."

"It's a sort of Birdman of Alcatraz situation, except that Martin here isn't a bird."

'I was a computer executive -- but I performed an illegal operation and was shut down.'