Italian Cuisine Pillows

Antipasti protest.

'If I order pasta and she orders antipasta, did we really order anything?'

"Does this look familiar to you, Mr. Funderburg?"

"Fresh pepper spray?"

Pizza By The Slice

Pasta of the Eighties

"Oh, wow! A lucky penne."

Man says: 'Great pizza, but the mozzarella was a bit stringy.'

'This is an eco-friendly Italian shoe. If you don't like it anymore, you can eat it with pasta sauce.'

'Sometimes I just feel like some pasta.'

'Garlic or non-garlic?'

"Hey, Mama!! Step it up!!!"

'Why can't you order Ravioli or pizza?'

Snot twirler.

'Sorry about that, sir.'

All you can eat. . . pizza.

'Well you asked for Al dente.'

"Let's hope on this visit there are no runs, no hits, no errors."

"I've got everything you've got and more - I just don't feel the need to tell the whole effin world about it"

"Who gets the linguini with my thumb in it?"

"Throw in some marinara sauce and you've got a deal."

"This gnocchi with sage butter looks nothing like my friend's Instagram photo."

Pizza Express

"Why exactly you were expecting gnocchi to be exciting, I couldn't tell you."

"Then it came to me - why should there be an upper limit for pasta size?"

'Romano, Romano, wherefore art thou Romano?'

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Farfalle the showoff."

Bill Barr's Last Day

"No, that one's my pasta machine."

"Al dente!"

'What do I do now'

"He'll have the pasta, make sure it's NOT al dente."

'The waiter wasn't lying when he said the chef puts his heart into his lasagna - I think I got the aorta.'

'Quick, Bernie - in here!'

The Blessing of the Pasta at Trattoria Del Vaticano