It Consultant Gifts

"If there's a way in, they'll find it."

Computer whisperer.

After paying the IT consultants we didn't have enough left for proper laptops!

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

"He says he''s working on some patches, exploits and vulnerabilities, but I know hacking when I see it."

'Boss, there's a computer on the line. It want's to know what to do with a stupid user who doesn't work!'

"That was our neighbor. He said our WIFI is out and that we need a stronger password."

'Of course things change: our fathers were replaced by machines - we'll be replaced with new software.'

"Someone has hacked into our Computer."

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Computer Expert

'He's my smart due. He's going to hand around for a couple weeks, and teach me how to use my new smart phone.'

Early Tech Support

"We've just bought some software that's 20% better at being you for half the cost so we're letting you go."

'Technology can be addictive. If the above is familiar - get help.'

"Kid, with your circuits, and my contacts, we're goin' all da way."

"Are we sure this is how we get our workloads into the cloud?"

IT Consultants

We Value Your Privacy (Actually, we value it at around $20 a pop for every organization we sell it to).

Business Consultants

'What 'it' are you working on?'

"He's not my grandson! He's my I.T. consultant!!"

'Keeping up with technology is a full-time job.'

"Another company thinks I might like to keep receiving their emails!"

"If the goat's giblets float to the top...about £350,000."

Microsoft today threatened to merge with India and become a nuclear power.

'Now that we're an E-business, maybe we should buy a computer.'

"My phone won't fold but the manufacturer did."

"Having our team all work on the same page has been a lot more difficult since our company has gone paperless."

Huawei 5G

Terms and conditions

"Remember when they used to call it the 'private sector?'"

They see you

"They sent their geeks! Drop your swords and grab your computers! It's a cyber attack!"

Do you have software for the samller business? Certainly, it's all tailor-made!