Irony Loving Golf Fan Gifts

Just Married.

Caddie brings his golfer a shovel in the sand trap.

'I'm not quitting! Who knows if i'll ever get another chance to break a hundred!'

'If he starts early enough, he could be the next Rory Mcilroy.'

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

"This is how I'd like to remember the Hamptons - with someone's golf Rolex sticking out of the sand."

'Have you got a sand wedge?'

"Well, yeah, Doc, I twisted my back a little...but it was the longest golf shot I've ever made!"

'I know Joe's sight isn't all that but the captain's not going to like it.'

Poor Walt - they don't make em like him anymore.

"One More Swing."

Mulligan's first mulligan.

TOLD YOU TO TAKE LESSONS FROM GOLF PRO

Meditating on a 4th for golf!

'Hmmm...I think I've figured out why you're slicing...'

'Tell me the truth,Rodney - you've moved the hole haven't you!'

'I knew it! Come back here!'

"One thing's for sure, nobody can fan a ball like you."

"So he pulls out a 1 iorn, see? I say to him. Bob I says, not even God can hit a 1 iron. Then, there was a flash of light and boom!"

"I'm guessing this is the first time Jack's had a chance to make par?"

"I don't think I'm ever going to get a hole in one!"

'Well, maybe it's in your genes to be attracted to sand...'

"Hoo-whee! Nice shot, Tom. You just missed the trap."

"Swallow another one, Pearson and you're fired."

Neanderthal Golf.

'This is the hole I was telling you about!'

'Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers?'

"Chinese food? I'll call it in if you'll pick it up."

"Don't worry about John. He just went to a hypnotist to improve his game."

'I don't care if he eagled with a great shot. I'm penalizing him a strok for excessive celebrating.'

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

'Bunker? It should be called a trench because that's where the real war starts!'

"One more swing and I'm outta here!"

Fore

'Lunge out of the water and slap his face!? ... Oh, that's real effective, Leonard.'