Irony Explorer Gifts

"...I'd like a mass of opiates please."

"I love these quiet evenings at home battling alcoholism."

Have you been here long? Prison number 2.

Proudly made in the USA by Illegal Immigrants.

Joes Vegetarian Restaurant, where the chef tucks into a steak

Blindman's blind guide dog with its own guide animal

'Well, that'll be an expensive bit of fun, buddy!'

'I'm going to be a lot more decisive from now on. Well... maybe not a lot more, but at least a little more.'

Biggest selling fly cereal on the market.

'Ever think that if you make another billion you'll be happy, and then you do, but you're not?'

Shopping Centre - No Hoods.

Out For A Working Lunch.

The glass house.

"Welcome to Sarcasm 101. I'm soooooo glad you could all be here today."

'At last, some good news about farming.'

"I know you're hurting. We're all hurting."

'The Pope has decided to issue another apology for not issuing an apology.'

Hey! This Way - the booming economy - good times...

Mr Nice Guy

"Unfortunately, my evil deeds attracted media attention."

Doctor's Appointment Tomorrow 2:30pm yours for £20.

"Anyone who doesn't know you, would think you are sophisticated."

'Welcome to my private hell.' - 'I love what you've done with the place.'

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.

"Hmm...that's not the sort of siren I had in mind..."

"I think you ought to reflect seriously on your behaviours."

'You going to pay for those crutches, lady?'

"Oh, he enraged at spotting yet another reference to 'Pot and Kettle' in a reader's letter."

"... A big round of applause."

"Oh, go on. Let them have a go at shooting the cigarette out of your mouth... I mean, it's not like it'll matter if they miss and accidentally hit you."

"...it was a bad idea getting them a kitten."

'Walk damn it!'

Do Not Accept Food From The Animals

"Mother always said I had an arresting personality."

You Are Dead Information Point.