Ironic Adventurer Gifts

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

"I'm feeling adventurous today, Penny – let's tack on a block."

"Now you can send it."

'Look on the bright side. At least we'll have one hell of a tan.'

'I wish I'd never seen Lost, now.'

'Sailing, it's a sport that doesn't float my boat.'

"I think I'd appreciate the outdoors more if all these stupid trees weren't blocking the view."

"I thought boating would help me relax."

"Forget the damn white whale, boys! My disability claim was approved. Turn this tub around."

"...it's another metal detector."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Thomas Mann.

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

'I was just playing rodeo and breaking horses.'

E=mc2.

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"To be honest, I don't mind the cold, and being an introvert, and slightly antisocial, I really treasure the quiet time when the others have flown south..."

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

Man fishing with large bait

Philosophy Department: You are here but why are you here?

"And with you on guard, I won't have to worry about that monster under my bed."

Workaholic's Hoilday Appartment

Super Student

'Bloody streakers - they have a lot to learn.'

"Barb's such a fast reader."

'I need to borrow your Ph.D. for a half hour tomorrow. I have a major problem to solve.'

"Police? My son and his friends were playing, building a moon rocket. . . I believe that they actually blasted off!"

Origami horse leaping out of a book about origami

Shoot For The Moon

"Wait, wait, back up, back up. Who the #!@! is George Orwell?"

Academic Jeopardy - "The great unknowns and cosmic uncertainties of the universe are reduced by this number daily."

"Water balloons... water balloons..."

Actual Extent Of Doug's Off - Road Adventures (Touching the kerb)

'This course in philosophy is not designed to teach you how to make a living. I will be teaching you how to make a life.'