Ironic Workaholic Gifts

"We have a clear work/life policy. . . If you have a life, you get more work."

'Holidays are for wimps.'

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

"I'm feeling completely wiped out."

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

Please sit down. I can give you five minutes.

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

"Yes, I saw the obituary. So, is that why you weren't in yesterday?"

Man running in a hamster wheel

'I want to empower you to fulfill your potential! If you can work 16 hours today, then your 20-hours shift tomorrow should really elevate your self-esteem'!

'When I took this job, I had no idea how much it would cut into my quality, family texting time.'

Workaholic's Hoilday Appartment

"Look, I'm dying. Gotta go."

"National Metaphor Day by the looks of it."

Computer monitor for a head.

'I didn't come in to hear that I'm burning the candle at both ends. I came for more wax.'

'What - no internet? No USB ports? No socket for the coffee machine? No phone? Are you crazy? My husband was a very important CEO!'

"You do realise that the post is only part time, no more than 70 or 80 hours a week."

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

"I need to clone myself."

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

'Don't disturb me - I'm in conference!'

"Don't open me, you fool!"

'I'm thinking of cutting my hours down to 24/7."

Man on beach blowing up an inflatable office.

Sisyphus Gets a Desk Job.

'Are you just back from work or on your way to the office?'

Worried man looking at stock market chart on his computer screen with office party going on in the background.

"We're looking for a workaholic with another job that'll provide the pension and health benefits we don't provide."

'We got you a bigger desk. With all the work we'll be dumping on you, you'll be needing it.'

"That can't be right. How'd you work 15 hours in on day?"