Iron Worker Gifts

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

"No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants."

'It may be industrial strength Crazy Glue©, but substituting it for welds isn't the way to be low bidder.'

Flop Musicals: Singing in the Crane.

'I play heavy metal.'

'I wish McWit would lead a life of quiet desperation.'

'Oooh, let's DO lunch.'

Safety First

'I don't need a hard hat, boss. I passed the plumb bob test where they dropped one on me from 50 stories up and I suffered no ill effects.'

A welder heats his soup with a blow torch.

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

Motivation to work

'Stop saying 'how high?' until I say 'jump'.'

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

'I'd give you a raise, but I had to throw tantrums to make my parents give me anything as a kid.'

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

Off Duty.

Now may not be a good time,he just found out he's not going to live forever.

Time Out For Teddy

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

Around here it got a little tricky...

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

Robot arm shows charity to a laid off beggar.

"Come to think of it, I can't think of the last time I saw a monarch around here."

'Jones, I don't like you because it's so hard to find something to blame you for!'

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

"The boss expects us all to be robots."

'It is a big day! Ten years ago, yout dad joined the union!'

'C'mon, guys. That old geezer just leg pressed 400 pounds when he got up from the chair.'

'Look, I said I'd bring you the report on micromanaging. Just give me a chance.'