Investment Devotee Gifts

'Hey, you with the cell phone, up here we don't allow buying stocks on margin.'

'If I didn't believe in what I was selling you, would I have them tattooed to my chest?'

'Now that I have your attention...'

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

Profit

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

Wall Street Couch

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

Day trading.

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

Thomas Hardy

"We're counting on you to reverse this trend before this afternoon's investors meeting."

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

'Not feeling well? Don't be silly - your EKG has outperformed the Dow.'

'I highly recommend this painting if you're interested in art as an investment.'

'No thanks, I don't drink when I'm driving home a point about investing.'

US dollar perched on fragile house of cards.

"My path to success and fortune was that rather than foraging and storing my own food, I built a portfolio of storage properties to rent..."

You're the olive in my martini

Men on escalators reading newspapers, shares are going up on the up escalator and down on the down escalator.

'Stocks rose on the rumor that the market is mostly rumor-driven.'

wealth investment