Internet Vigilante Gifts

"Don't read it! He's phishing."

'Don't come whining to me. Get back online and hack him right back.'

"My goodness, Gurkenham! This is the worst case of identity theft I've ever seen!"

"You're stealing from the rich and selling it to the poor on Craigslist?"

Lynching on social media

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

'Well, Mr. 'I don't need any sunblock', what have you got to say for yourself now?'

Guide to Contagious Diseases.

"Peter Parker is Spiderman! Clark Kent is Superman!! Bruce Wayne is Batman!"

The new global mantra flag for the future

You can relax now.

About 40% of the nation's coronavirus deaths could have been prevented...

Johnson allows the Delta variant to run wild in Britain

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

"Boy, has it been hacked!"

"It's the Grammar Police! Have you been using 'your' when you should be using 'you're' again?"

Guns won't help

"Please enter the last 4 digits of your SSN...or enter all 9. They're all over the dark web."

'Drugs' 'Viruses'.

I've got to monitor all chatter in the cafe to prevent future pastry thefts. I don't know … What if you've got a scone thief for a neighbor, or a friend, or even a family member? Sure, today it's just a scone. But the next attack could be huge – the big one! You don't mean … Hoagie. They're trying to destroy our whole way of life.

'Computer crime seems to be on the rise.'

"He's just discovered that out 450,000 blog rebuttal campaign was directed against a 12 year old in Swindon using his mums computer."

Wrong ways to wear a face mask.

'Well doctor, is it serious?'

Ebola Clinic

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. I wish I had emotions like people do. I wish I could think as logically as people do. I'd like to take a walk along the shoreline without rusting. Storing energy in a battery rather than a pot belly would be nice. Having a sense of humor would be fun. The ability to selectively delete memories would be great to have. I wish I didn't have to worry about digital viruses. I wish I didn't have to worry about biological viruses.

Fair readers, please accept these personal tips for remaining healthy and germ free. Public service announcement! Keep your stress low. Exercise, eat right, hydrate and try to get a little affection in your life, if you get my meaning. If you use someone else's computer, wipe down the keyboard with alcohol to kill the germs. Ditto with the mouthpiece of a borrowed cellular phone. Don't touch anything or anyone. Bathe yourself in hand sanitizer. Don't leave the house, and if you do, don't inhale

To insure Rodney's safe websurfing, Thelma sets her own parental controls.

'Hacking into our system is one way to get my attention.'

"The jocks bullied me in gym class, so I erased all the data on their computers. They should know never to mess with a computer geek."

"I do wish they'd hurry up with that vaccine, so I can get back to worrying about dying of something else."

We Value Your Privacy (Actually, we value it at around $20 a pop for every organization we sell it to).