Internet User With Patience Pillows

Buy on-line - Fill in form, Fill in form again, And again, Lose form, Fill-in form a few more times, Give up and go to shop...

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

Likes: $2.

'No, Mr. Simmons, your MR images aren't in yet. We have older equipment, which takes a little longer to process.'

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

'I don't care what the Hares have. Dial-Up is good enough for us!'

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

"Sorry, website closed for lunch."

Man doing a search on a computer

'An encyclopedia? I don't know. Let's look up what it is on Wikipedia.'

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

'1001 things to do whilst waiting to get on the internet.'

"The Internet ate my baby!"

'Do you have 4G up here?'

"Alright. What should we watch first - the Youtube video or the comments below?"

'How do I get people to visit my...'

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

"Home is where the WiFi is."

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

I e-bay t-shirt.

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Try again - Your password has to include barks, growls, whines and at least one yap.

>Enter new password: BEEF STEW >Password not stroganoff.

'Melvin, you're trying my patience.'

'Another big newspaper just went out of business.', 'How did you hear about that?', 'I read it on the internet.'

"'Can correctly complete a CAPTCHA image 8 our of 10 times.' Any other skills?"

Scientist researching animal droppings is looking at Faeces Book on the computer.

Bill Johnson 1914-2000: Server Timed Out.

'The times they are a-changin'.'

Information Macht Frei

Snail crossing