Internet Debates Gifts

'I warned you to stay out of those flame wars!'

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

My new laptop is nicer than your new laptop. I'm not going to get into a competition about whose new laptop is nicer. The one I replaced is nicer than the one you replaced. Stop it.

The Proust of Twitter

"We broke up. I wanted a proprietary platform - she wanted open source."

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."

"I had a great weekend... My Grandpa talked about the war again and my Dad about his most daring facebook comments!"

'As soon as I mention Nietzsche - stop serving me, okay.'

'I can watch T.V. shows on the computer, so who needs a TV?'

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comment section just solved the Middle East crisis."

I can't keep up, Randy. What happened, little buddy? You know how I created a hate-bot to automate my back you up in online arguments business? Don't tell me: The Russian troll farms beat you to it. No. My hate-bot became sentient and created an even snarkier hate-bot. Mankind is officially obsolete. For an extra $1, the HB-1000 will throw in racism and misogyny.

Too many people post comments in the heat of anger. They strike while the ire is hot!

'I inherited therefore I am'

"I can tell you about this article or you can just read the comments online."

"I learned my social skills on social media. . . what's it to you anyway you stupid cow?!"

Philosophie.fr Bulletin Board - 1936

"Sorry, Man! I had no idea Alexa would be here!"

"Not now, honey. Daddy's arguing with strangers about the sexual orientation of puppets."

"I know you're wrong, I just can't get the computer to say it yet."

"How's your lowrider blog going?"

'The beauty of this is that it is only of theoretical importance, and there is no way it can be of any practical use whatsoever.'

'You're a nihilist, eh? — well, at least you have something to believe in.'

'I don't think therefore I'm not.'

Unsocial Networking.

To tweet, or not to tweet - that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the snark and the venomous replies of anonymous jerks

Social network site runs into trouble.

The First Asshole

"Whatever the politicians might decide, I'm well prepared because I've got enough hate comments for the next five years!"

"Thank you for participating in this poll, but because your answers do not coincide with your social media rantings, you're obviously lying."

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

Maybe Those Bots Can Be Used for Good

'Don't internalise that simmering rage -- get it out of your system on website comments sections.'

Every man and his dog gets to have an opinion on social media.