Internet Dating Explorer Gifts

'That one? Alright, I'll send Igor to collect her.'

"Yes, there is someone else...in fact, several guys, on the Macho Escorts website."

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"We first met on the net. We began to court, but between my foul mouth and Wilson being on the rebound...let's just say it was a long shot, but he pressed, and I was defenseless. Now, we're as 'hoopy' as can be."

"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"

Online Dating

That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

"I just love a nice knight out."

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

"This sounds promising. . . dark brown hair, loyal, cuddly and good in bed."

Barman indicates sick bucket, alongside usual ice bucket, saying to attractive woman: 'That's there in case you hear any particularly bad chat-up lines.'

"Don't blame me! Your profile said nothing about a seafood allergy."

"Your online profile says you like to foxtrot."

"Your profile said that you liked long walks on the beach."

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

"I thought on your profile it said you were into 'BIKING'."

"Sorry, pal. I just need to make sure she likes me for me."

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

"Hi, I'm Miranda: I like sniffing bums, rolling about in dead things and chasing tennis balls. . ."

"You know that on-line romance you've been carryin' on? Well this here's Samantha!"

Well, I didn't know he was a dragon when I met him online!

"What if I dress up like a Chihuahua?"

"I must say, Doctor Jeckyll, that you bear little resemblance to your profile picture."

'Frankly, I'm looking for someone who's tall, dark and solvent.'

"I'll be honest with you, Jeannette, I'm looking for a no-load relationship."

"I'm looking for a long-distance relationship."

'George and I met on line!'

"I'm not looking for Mr.Right, Just Mr. Swipe-right!"

'Your credit card or mine?'

'Oh - My - God - I think I'm virtually married.'

Computer dating.