Interior Snoop Gifts

"I like looking at amateur porn, because I like seeing other people's apartments."

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

"It's beautiful. I'm just not sure it's $800 beautiful."

'Outside with that!'

"My life must really be boring. I asked the guy why he hacked into my social media and he replied that reading it helps him get to sleep a night."

"We hired all the designers ourselves."

"Yes, it's snowing in my office. Corporate feels utilities, like heat, are a luxury."

"As you can see, it comes fully furnished!"

"I like it. Just trying to imagine how it would look in my yoga studio."

"That's the window, dear. The bookcase is over to your right."

Need something from the fridge? This looks like a job for...Indoorman!

'We like to make full use of the space.'

"I want to vacation where we can look at something scenic from some place climate-controlled."

VARIOUS ITEMS OF LABELLED KITCHENWARE.

"It's a nice unit, but there may be a faint odor from the last tenant..." "Yeah, enough to make you faint."

"Looks like beach weather."

"I think it's a Spider Plant bite."

A great paper if you have a house full of kids...

"When I grow up I want to be a journalist. I love sneaking around and reading journals."

'It's a beautiful day. Go out and click.'

'This is an up and coming area. You may wish to shave before you buy the paper in future.'

"I work a lot, so I don't get outside much. THe best I could do is paint my office like the outdoors."

"Regale me with more tales of the outside world."

Bed, Bath and Beyond.

'Of course I threw it - It's a throw pillow.'

I hear the present owners are splitting up. Four fireplaces and a wine cellar. Better act quick, before they make up.

The room you gave me was so small every time I bent over I rearranged the furniture.

A sofa for every budget!

Indoor Picnic.

'John decided to turn this room into a library but why I'll never know.'

'I think I like sitting here instead of in our back yard better. . . it's more interesting seen' what everybody's up to on our street. I guess we're just people persons.'

Storm Darragh

"Papi, I need a bigger bedroom. The one I have isn't big enough for a the both of us."

Keeping Up With The DoorDashians

"All our furniture comes pre-shredded by our carefully selected in-house cats."