Interior Explorer Gifts

"It's a nice unit, but there may be a faint odor from the last tenant..." "Yeah, enough to make you faint."

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

"Tour de Frank"

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

"Hey Scout, isn't ice fishing great?"

Non-Drip ?

'She'll never look for me here.'

"All a cat CAN do is strive for authenticity."

Moving in

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."

'Outside with that!'

'I think I'm getting somewhere. On the way over I stopped to smell the flowers.'

'Dear, could you hold it down to a light snow flurry?'

"It's all about you, isn't it?"

"Last night I dreamed I caught my tail."

Please excuse him, he's intent.

Rowing machine on a river.

"Why do you feel like you're lost?"

"Are you there now, Linda? Are you in that happy, safe place that brings you peace and assurance, and deep contentment?"

Sign pointing to 'hindsight' and 'foresight'

"It all began when I was a boy. The aroma of freshly baked bread was everywhere, choking me with it's calm, soothing and nutritious lies..."

"You're born, you deconstruct your childhood, and then you die."

Three cases of therapy-resistant low self-esteem

Hold on Cutlet! We have to get past Mom's waxed floor!

"You're sucking all the fun out of my misery."

"I'm in the middle of a local wine tasting tour."

"You're going to create the same problems on the way down as you created on the way up."

Motorway of the Self

"My parents call it a blanket hanging from my ceiling. I call it a giant privacy filter."

"There's a house-plant round here somewhere."

"Yes, it's snowing in my office. Corporate feels utilities, like heat, are a luxury."

Paranoia Clinic