Intergalactic Tax Enthusiast Pillows

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

"Take me to your mechanic."

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

"You really clean up on these mileage deductions, don't you."

"What gear are we in, biscuit?"

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

'We've gone to profit-sharing. But it's with the IRS.'

"Hold on - I need to tell the credit card company I'm going on a trip."

'...And you're always complaining about the government's international trade agreements'

Woah, This was well worth swapping my flying saucer for!

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

"Look at that – they’re retreating!"

IRS, 'It might make you feel better if you just think of it as a negative entitlement.'

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

'Well, that's how we mix martinis around here.'

"Remember everybody, this is planet Earth, so whatever you do, don't drink the water!"

'You realize, of course, Death is the ultimate tax shelter?'

"Did you bring more cars?"

"Oh the little green men are from the planet Thargon, we're the big blue men from Zefflon 8."

"Let's find a planet with a better rating."

Budget reaction.

"Are we there yet?"

"I don’t know why we bother traveling—they just missed the entire Milky Way."

'We learned today that the world is a huge ball, which revolves on it's taxes.'

'Ah, I see you made £2,000 more for me this year.'