Intergalactic Pet Owner Gifts

"I thought I told you to take your new pet outside. Now it's drilling holes in the furniture!"

Rocket Launch Control Centre Back in 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

Marry me astronaut

"Take me to your mechanic."

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

"Hold on - I need to tell the credit card company I'm going on a trip."

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

"What gear are we in, biscuit?"

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

"Let's f**k up Mars!"

Christmas on Other Planets.

'...And you're always complaining about the government's international trade agreements'

'Well, that's how we mix martinis around here.'

"Take us to Disneyworld then, if there's time, to your leader."

'Look at him out there... so cold, so distant. Why do I always fall for the bad boys?'

"Wow! - Do all Earth people look as tasty as YOU do?"

Woah, This was well worth swapping my flying saucer for!

"I wonder what he dreams about...Squirrels I bet."

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

"Remember everybody, this is planet Earth, so whatever you do, don't drink the water!"

"Did you bring more cars?"

Galaxy line - leaving Milky Way - entering Andromeda

'Good afternoon, Earthling -- I represent the 'Encyclopedia Galactica,' and....'

"I suggest you read this book....it comes highly recommended by earthlings."

"Let's find a planet with a better rating."

"Are we there yet?"

"Oh the little green men are from the planet Thargon, we're the big blue men from Zefflon 8."

'Last time I share-house with a Wookie!'

Spaceman (outside his ship) looking at aliens on a planet.