Intergalactic Decorator T-Shirts

'The meteor saved us a bundle on a rock garden!'

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'We had the baby's ultrasound photo made into wallpaper.'

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

Use your imagination.

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

Martha Stewart Takes Over The Universe

"Careful with that - the wife made it at pottery class."

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"You're welcome."

'Come on, you can help me to choose some lovely wallpaper.'

"Too bright."

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

"Could we be getting a little too museum-quality?"

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

'The roof needs icing.'

'Gerald was stripping some old wallpaper, and there it was - Leonard Da Vinci's lost fresco ‘The Battle of Anghiari'.'

Books / Coffee table books

"The next time we redecorate, how about if I choose the art?"

'It's my main decorating motif.'

"You love anything tacky, don't you?"

An assortment of vegetables in the form of Tables

Unknowingly, with one swish of his blood soaked mammoth tail he was inflicting pain and suffering on billions of unborn people. Home decorating had been invented.

"Who should we have at eye level this month?"

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of being a painter are the hardest.'

'I found out how to redecorate the easy way - just call the old wallpaper names and it will come down to slap you!'

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

'All it needs is a ceiling fan.'

Over 50 shades of grey available.

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

A centipede's Christmas stockings

Den Furniture