Insurance Rethinker Gifts

"Your insurance doesn't cover the prescription, so this is the placebo."

'I want to forewarn you that my HMO won't approve any treatment that uses a needle.'

'But he qualifies for medicare in dog years.'

'I think we're setting the bar too low.'

"Your insurance just called. They don't cover 'having a bad day.'"

'Relax, we're letting you go. Your insurance didn't go through.'

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of insurance forms.

"New Year's resolutions are fine, but we should really focus on squad goals."

"We tried every fix the insurance companies allow but it still won't fly!"

'Our policy is quite plain. We don't pay out on claims we can't pronounce.'

Non-Drinkers and Smokers Insurance Policy

'Yes,I do have a question.. What kind of dental plan do you have?'

After working 80 hours a week for 30 years, Raymond was struggling to adjust to retirement.

'I recommend a second opinion so the HMO won't second guess me.'

Medicaid Expansion: "Better not take the risk, you never know when the well's going to run dry..."

'My career goal is to honor my warrior spirit within the context of the insurance underwriting field.'

"His blood work doesn’t look half as bad as his HMO."

'Don't worry, I'll do all I can for you until your health insurance cancels you for getting sick.'

"He's had several billing procedures named after him."

'Your insurance only covered the removal of the damaged organ...you'll have to put the transplant in yourself.'

'Have you ever heard the parable of the lawn left unmowed?'

'I'm just a struggling actor. Your insurance policy doesn't cover a real doctor.'

"Whoa! That's a little clingy."

'There's really no need for confusion with this Medicare stuff. Page 95, section 33, paragraph L in the instructions quite clearly says ... '

'We're going to need a specialist. To help fill in the insurance form.'

'The bad news is, during open enrollment we get to choose between our uncaring, inconvenient plan or another one that's just as bad or worse.'

'Welcome! Do you have any questions? Concerns? Pre-existing conditions?'

"Yes, it is a very large bill. Unfortunately, the doctor who gave you a second opinion charges ten times what I do."

"It wouldn't kill you to pay your bill."

A $50 co-pay? Well, go find someone named 'Co' and maybe they can pay you."

"Flowers? That's so arrogant!"

'Is this gonna raise my premium?'

'The operation turned out better than I expected. Your insurance paid for everything.'

'You look sick. Why don't you see your health insurance underwriter to see what he'll allow your doctor to prescribe?'