Insurance Humor Fan Gifts

'I'm sorry, but when you took out the policy, you never specified that it was a mobile home.'

Boudica is unhappy with her quote for chariot insurance.

'And what to tell our insurance company?'

Yeah, your rates are very good, but your ads on TV just aren't funny enough

'We may have to postpone medically probing you until we can confirm you have insurance to pay for it.'

"I need life insurance. Period of validity at least 790 years."

"No ma'am, 'bad faith insurance' doesn't protect you against a crooked televangelist."

"I have eternal life? Does that mean I can cancel my life insurance policy?"

"Remember, Mr. Jones, whatever doesn't kill you makes your health insurance premiums go up."

"We are here to remove a blockage in your bank account."

'The frog is deceased, Mr. Graham. You don't need malpractice insurance.'

"Trust me, darling. It was only a bumper car ride. I promise, it won't affect your no claims bonus."

'Hi! -- I'm selling theory insurance!'

COMPAGNIE D'ASSURANCE DE PARIS, 'I can't believe you sold an insurance policy to NOSTRADAMUS!'

'...in sickness and in health, with full coverage or without...'

'Your medical coverage does not consider that a medical necessity.'

'Must have had bad weather at the Artist's Colony. All the claims start with 'It was a dark and stormy night.''

So...who is your provider ?

Captain Eddie's New Boat: 'First of all, Eddie, most people don't usually lose theah boats...'

'Your policy doesn't cover you against huffing and puffing.'

"Under our health care plan, you get low premiums, a low deductible and a free, yearly probe."

"Is this Bart from Country Farm? This is Dan the Unrideable. Yep, happened again. "

"I really do think I could be an anarchist, but my insurance won't cover that."

'Hello, I'd like to apply for some property insurance.'

"Can I interest you in nine life policies?"

'I'm sorry, but your husband's life insurance policy only covered his eighth life.'

Slipping Insurance $5.

'Hello, I'm selling life insurance. Tell me, sir, are you covered?'

"No, its not a pre-existing condition."

"Have you noticed, our insurance policy has expired?"

"I was really hoping we wouldn't have to get insurance involved."

"You're doing fine, and we're cautiously optimistic about your insurance."

Insurance agents in Heaven.

'Sorry Sir, but you don't seem to be covered for hail damage...'

'Don't worry. This will hurt your insurance company more than it will hurt you.'