Insomnia Conqueror Gifts

'The nurses tell me that you're having trouble sleeping, so I thought I'd try a sermon just to help.'

"I had to switch to tea, coffee was keeping me up all day."

"Well, if you're still awake when the time changes, you'll lose an hour of overthinking everything, too."

'Well, he still has his neuroses, but at least I cured his insomnia.'

Cactus Alarm.

'Dear, I can't sleep! Would you put on your sheep skin coat and jump back and forth across the bed a few times?'

Artists paints sheep jumping over a fence to get sleepy.

Sleeping artist has been painting picture of sheep.

'zzz sleep.'

'Sure I sleep all day. She snores all night.'

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."

"The overthinker"

Noisy energy?

"Uh-oh it's happening aain, the feeling I'm being triggered...."

Your stress is stress-related.

The Forever Stamp

"Clearly the patient's experiencing difficulty attaining the deep, final level of restful sleep."

'Don't be nervous but I think we're about to go LIVE on the new system.'

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

"Never get between a mama bear and her cub – unless you want to hear a long story about our struggles with bedtime."

"Well, how can I help cure your severe hypochondria if you keep cancelling appointments due to illness?"

Center For Sleep Deprivation

'I'm not convinced you need tranquillizers to switch phone provider.'

'I couldn't sleep so I decided to do some on-line trading.'

"Would you mind getting me the Ambien, the Tiger Balm, three cookies, a cup of tea and a pillow for my legs?"

"Mr. Carley, would you like to begin today’s session?" "Claustrophobic's therapy session today at 2:00"

"About that insomnia...have you tried counting billable hours?"

"It's probably just stress, but let's take a look. Open up and say, ARGGGH!!!"

"In order to get through this, I've had to find an inner strength that I never knew I had in the medicine cabinet."

Number Phobia.

The afternoons are okay, it's at night that I can't sleep.

"No, not us. Do something every day that scares you."

"It would keep me awake all night, but I'm up for a game of coffee pong first thing in the morning."

"I'm incredibly happy - must be the medication speaking."

'There's an App for that.' Man and Disgruntled Dream Sheep.