Inside Scoop Seeker Gifts

Wikileaks and the Credit Cards

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

'What clan do you belong to?'

Crap from the future.

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

'You're a genius, Hoppy!'

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).

Useless add-ons.

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Sorry, Frank, I know this is your favourite lake, but I just can't eat fish who smoke cigarettes.'

Wikipedia...

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."

'Don't you think it's just a little weird to have a cemetery for houseplants?!'

Mohammad's motors

"I'm still not sure if we've hired a creative genius or a complete cretin."

Pirate playing pool using his artificial leg as a pool stick.

"I'd like to be a shake-it-off kind of person, but I'm more of a cling-to-it-and-focus-on-it-until-it's-irrevocably-weaved-into-my-psyche sort of gal."

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

"All the celebrities come here."

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

Clock and Watch Shop: Second-Hand Clocks and Minute-Hand Clocks.

Scrooge is visited by the ghost of prehistoric past.

Office of the Special Investigator: Stepped out to follow the 'money trail'.

Toenail clipping missile.

Goldie Locks and the three beers.

"What'd you think the zipper on my face was for?"