Insect Nemesis Gifts

"And with you on guard, I won't have to worry about that monster under my bed."

'Sorry, Dad. My offensive lineman says I don't have to go to bed yet.'

Stop smoking,instantly.

"Why couldn't you open that wide during the procedure?"

"My nose whistling is keeping me awake all night."

'Go get the hose, George! That gopher is back!'

"It's a sort of Birdman of Alcatraz situation, except that Martin here isn't a bird."

That's it. I'm killing that moth.

'Pasta imposter' "Oi! You're not vermicelli, you're cheese string..bugger off!!"

Finally free of cable TV costs

"Sorry about that. He doesn't like bikes."

Hunter with Santa Claus as a Trophy

Tortured by music

'He didn't go for the throat, but close.'

'Attention!!! You wolves down there!!! Get away from my door!!! I'm doing the best that I can!!!'

'You know what? I agree with my son's opinion of you.'

Angry man shoots at musical notes from guitar player.

England training camp "Keeps 'em out of the nightclubs."

"I'll be studying with Cruz at house."

"Hello, Mr. Gottlieb of Acme Telemarketing? Oh, did I interrupt your dinner...?"

'He's taking the No Smoking Day very seriously.'

Automatic Doors - "Damn.. I wish they would put a closed sign up!!"

'Wouldn't it be easier to change your network Dear?'

'I'll look for apples -- you keep an eye out for early birds.'

Ornithologist: 'I don't do teeth, I tell you! I do birds!'

Sadie, I just read that the moon used to be a lot closer to earth. You? "Read"? Yes, I read all the time. It takes you that long to read a book? Now that's not nice, Mrs. Cohen. We don't have to go at each other all the time, do we? I dream of a day when you and I can let bygones be bygones, embrace one another, and give each other the respect each of us deserves. Nothing doing! Come on, Sadie. Don't you ever wonder how happy we could be if we called a cease-fire? How about it? ... Friends? (Sig

"I remember telling you to go to hell, too."

So, arch-nemesis, you need my help. What for, pray tell? Mumble, mumble, mumble … Speak up, person who needs my side counsel. Oh, fine! I need help using a computer. And thus the heavens opened and light shone upon the world. Worst day of my life.