Information Technology Gifts

"Guide us, Oh Database Manager!"

"O.K., I'm good for I.T.—how about spreadsheets, anybody here good at spreadsheets?"

"I'll need all the information you can find on why I need so much information."

A man reads a sign in an information window that reads, 'Out getting more.'

'For outstanding work in computer science, I present you with this activation key to the city!'

'That book is still floating around the system.'

'Data Dude' magazine.

"We remain reasonably confident that once we nail down the little network problem we're having, all Hell will be able to break loose according to the modified schedule, which, unfortunately, is in a file we can't seem to locate right now."

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

Stealing digital data from computers.

Information about information about information about information.

"I've downloaded your cumulative wisdom and there's still 99.9% free disk space."

Big Bang Boulevard

'If someone sent an email and the National Security Agency did not spy on it, would it still be an email?'

'A couple of years ago, nobody knew anything. Now, everybody wants to know everything.'

"We can have someone there in a few minutes to help you with your computer. Can you have a mattress outside to soften his landing?"

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"My email is down... talk to me."

The Anti-Agent

"Welcome to the future"

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

Lynching on social media

Robot Parts $5

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

'The check is in the email attachment.'

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'