In Labor Pillows

'Can you hold on a few more minutes? They're on the 8th hole.'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

Cry babies.

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

37 years in the same position.

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

"You were right: I don't like water, but I do love snow!"

Overworked in the office

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

Working hours.

'What a drive! Our boy's going to go a long, long way.'

'I play so hard that I have no time to work hard.'

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

'I guess mother and baby are doing fine. She's already sending out selfies.'

'These are job perks.'

Time for More Paperwork

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

Office slaves.

"Yes, I saw the obituary. So, is that why you weren't in yesterday?"

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

"Have you and Tim picked out a name for the career obstacle yet?"

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

Boy makes snowman around a lamp post.

'I keep very close touch with the office in case things are running too smoothly without me.'

City Boy.

Motivation to work

Late/Too Late.

"I am not a workaholic. I just work to relax."

Clients who show up early for an appointment are really annoying ??" especially when you work from home.

Man running in a hamster wheel

'Let's keep in mind that although quitters never win, they often manage to avoid litigation.'

Push Push Push: sign on maternity ward doors.