Imitation Appreciator Gifts

"This is my friend Ted, and this is Ted's lower-priced knockoff."

Madonna of the Pukes.

"Who's got the hammer?"

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

Trump! The Musical

Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

Night of the Zombonies.

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"Steamed vegetables."

Meat Grinder

'Oh Hi!'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

Russia Money Laundering

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

The Greek Trampoline

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

"Amateurs."

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.