Imam Prints

'...Pants! - Forgot the megaphone!'

Religion Today

"Eventually the leaders of every religion say 'We spoke to God and he wants you to give us money.' ...Every. Single. One."

At the 2021 Religious Games

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

Church leader at desk has 3 boxes marked 'Black', 'White' and 'Gray Area'.

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

"Black or white, Vicar?"

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

Priest's 'To do' list.

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

'Okay.. what the hell.'

Night-time halo

'The meek shall inherit the Earth!'

Ghostwriting the Bible

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

God Sneezes Out Creation

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

"Er – if you young people don't mind, I have a few things to do now. Perhaps you have a hotel or somewhere to go?"

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

The Apostle Paul receives a reply from the Corinthians.