Imaginative Inheritor Gifts

'On the face of it, it sounds great that she left me her house, but it has gone stale and what Hansel and Gretel didn't eat the birds have had a go at.'

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

A boy acting suspiciously

Rocking horse

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

"First snowman?"

Children in fancy dress on the way to music lessons

Building giant sand pies.

The Day Dreamer.

'I hope it;s an express.'

"I'm making pink lemonade!"

'Cover me... I'm going in.'

"Jessica has an idea about going to the beach that she'd like to pitch you."

"Every time I tie my shoes, the laces come undone...I think it's a conspiracy!"

"I'm getting it registered as an historical landmark."

Like many kids, Bobby had an imaginary friend. Unfortunately for Bobby, he was a critic.

Look Mom! I'm cat-scanning!

Windmill

'Max really likes those genetic markers.'

"Kids."

Trainset

"Put on a tie. We've been invited to the castle."

Tiger Costume

"So...you finally getting a girlfriend this year?"

Toy White House built incorrectly.

"She wants the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth."

'Ever since you told your son he has blue blood, he's been telling everyone he's a Martian.'

No wishing

"Someday, son, all this will be yours..."

Irvine Welsh

Child thinking pregnant mother looks like a Telly-Tubby.

'It just says strange things happened after she ate the wafers. It doesn't mention their street value.'

'I know I've been sitting here all morning...We're playing doctors and I'm in the waiting room.'

"I've just performed a tonsillectomy on Daddy while he was asleep."