Image Editing Gifts

Royal Pic Photoshop

"You mean you haven't seen my status update? I photoshopped a beard on all my pictures."

'The numbers should look better this quarter since they've been photoshopped.'

"Ghah! I've got so many photoshop layers open, that the layer numbers have started at zero again!"

"Well I admit I might have photoshopped my online picture a bit!"

Campaign for Plain English

A Copy Editor and His Dog

Punctuation Police

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

Personnel - "This letter of recommendation is full of misspellings!"

"Baxter...about this report...your punctuation, spelling and grammar are perfect. No one can understand it!"

Contemporary English Lesson: The Cat was Sat on the Mat.

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

Your resume begins Once Upon A Time...I like that!

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."

Ironing Punctuation

"Confounded spell checker... never catches anything."

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

'The grammar's awful and the spelling's atrocious - otherwise it's an impressive CV.'

Editor.

THE REPORT: Some of this is brilliant, but that can be fixed.

'Do it write the first time.'

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

'To them, capital punishment means making them use proper capitalization.'

'I suppose that's where things get ironed out.'

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

"Tom's writing has been going really well! He's written over 200,000 words. Now he just needs to work out what order to put them in!"

Man ironing the censorship into a book.

'It feels like I'm very much in a good place these days. That is, aside from the grammar.'