Idle Enthusiast Pillows

'That would be your perfect job...paid to do nothing!'

'Well I'd love to stay and chat, but this is one of those 'get things done' days.'

Bad for you but to die for

Hush puppy.

"Sigh...Another sherry Harold...Go team ect."

'Did you hear that? They said 'Hello' to you.'

"We need to rethink our strategy of hoping the Internet will just go away."

Project Manager Showdown

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

"Yeah, and the new job lets me work from home."

'Doesn't seem right somehow-REAL ale in PLASTIC glasses!'

"I've found if I squint my eyes and frown, it looks like I'm concentrating rather than sleeping.".

The Old Dun Cow - Bitter & twisted.

'Leonardo's Lament' - 'I have nothing to do.'

"Well, sometimes I'll just hang around and do nothing. Oh wait, that's all the time."

Beer

"Let's just get through the first aisle...then we'll discuss your impulse buying."

'Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?'

If knee could talk: "Please sit back down."

"I had to close all my social media accounts. They were making me anti-social."

'And slowly, over time, Al and his chair became one!'

"Sure, I love the scent of a REAL tree, but nothing beats the convenience of ignoring the holidays altogether."

Using an electric toothbrush to stir tea

'Do you have anything on obtrusive personality disorder?'

Couch potato's shirt, "It suits you!"

"...and this is our Agile project!"

Over-qualified?

'This is your last wish. Are you sure you want to use it to change channel again?'

Free Little Library

'Ghah. They've moved everything round again.'

"Axle! - Will you STOP messing about??"

Shut the F#%* up! (Formally Shhhh!)

"I'm excited to leave this party we're going to."

Make America Quiet

Card night for introverts.