Idioms Aficionado Pillows

"Why is it always me? What's wrong with Edward or Siegfried or Elizabeth or Margaret? But no! It's always 'Katie bar the door!'"

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Thanks for walking a mile in my shoe but it's beginning to hurt now."

The devil you know and his plus one

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

"Ahhh....I think that was a flying fuck."

"Nuts to you, too."

Sauce for the Goose

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

"Sir, your ducks, they are not in a row."

Another day in the Splenda mines

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

"It's an honest mistake I'm sure we'll never hear of again."

Spot Quiz....

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

"Wow, what a DILF."

"I won't be in today, I'm feeling a little under the coffee table."

"And when you realized it was the wrong tree, why do you think you kept barking up it?"

"Enough about the forest, why don't you show us more trees?"

'Justin, this isn't what I meant when I said we could make out like bandits.'

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

Baptism Then and Now

"No more thinking outside the box Bamford. From now on I want you to do all your thinking inside your box!"

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

Suddenly Paul realised that HE had been the odd one out all along.

"You scratch my back, I'll scratch your is just a figure of speech, Ned. A little left, and higher."

"Congratulations! You've won the bid."

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

"Good news. You know that elephant in the room we never talk about? He's now in the other room."

"I still have my loophole, but I can't drive a truck through it."

"And this is my oldest son I was telling you about. The one that eats like a horse."

"Remember saying you'll give us a raise when 'pigs fly?' Well, it's time to pay up."

Museum of Natural Cliches

S**t Threw a Goose