Idiom Fanatic Pillows

"What's eating you now, Eric?"

Storm in a Teacup

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

The Fourth Little Pig

"Thanks for walking a mile in my shoe but it's beginning to hurt now."

The tooth fairy.

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

"All I can say is thank goodness for teleconferencing."

Dragon Hair-dryer.

Lady of the bath...

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

More Reasons To Beware Of Dog

Boy and Bear and Monster

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

Warrior Woman

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

The devil you know and his plus one

"Ahhh....I think that was a flying fuck."

"Nuts to you, too."

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

'OK, so I fumbled. Now can you cure it or not?'

"One side is for depression, the other is for anxiety, and if you're still confused make an appointment with the cat."

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

Newt sale

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

Sauce for the Goose

"Sir, your ducks, they are not in a row."

"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

Catasaurus

"Cthulhus, sir. Thousands of 'em."

Nobody mourned Sir Dad-Joke.