Identity Theft Counselor Pillows

'It was really hard for him when somebody stole his identity...but it felt even worse when they gave it back.'

'I use the clones to help prevent identity theft.'

"Yours is the worst case of identity theft I've investigated."

'I'm here due to an identity theft.'

"One of you got online and stole my identity, which is weird because there's not one thing unique about us."

'Well, I don't know anything about 'identity theft'. All I can tell you, is that according to these records you're already here.'

Man sees his double in ID parade. Policeman says: 'Please indicate which of these men stole your identity.'

"All right, which one stole your identity?"

"We had our identities stolen, and they took everything!"

"Millions at risk from identity theft - good thing I'm safe."

"I'll need to see some ID before you can settle this account..."

You know what? I think we are victims of identity theft!

'I've found that poverty helps protect my identity.'

'It was identity theft by my body double!'

"Does any of them look like the man who stole your identity?"

"The person who stole my identity is in this city, so look for someone who looks and acts like me."

'I see you need help. When was your identity stolen, sir?'

Now in Stock! 25 Million Names and Addresses on a 2 Disk Set.

Credit Cards Shredded.

"I think you're perfect for this job. And not just because I'm afraid that if you don't get it you'll hack my phone and steal my identity."

"We'll do everything we can. In the meantime, would you like a new identity to replace your stolen one."

"Great news! All of those bill collectors stopped hounding me because the hacker who stole my identity is being hounded by them now."

'We'll try. In the meantime, I can offer you a great deal on a new identity to replace yours.'

Someone stole my identity. What do I do with all my monogrammed shirts?

'I'm flattered... someone stole my identity.'

"That's the guy who stole my identity."

'Someone stole my identity, but left my big hips.'

"Well, I suppose it could be identity theft. But that doesn't alter the fact that according to our records, you're already here."

"The beauty of it is that, if you ever look like losing the battle of the sexes, you can switch to the other side."

"Whoa! This is my stolen identity!"

"Give me your name, address, and date of birth."

We value your business and we're sensitive to your privacy concerns...

'Sorry, it looks like your credit card has been cloned.'