"Give me your name, address, and date of birth."
Identity Theft Consultant Pillows
Add comfort and humor to an identity theft consultant's space with a playful pillow. It's a cozy reminder of their important work in protecting personal information.
The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."
"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."
Do you have a phone with recording capabilities? I want to be able to carry a wire when I meet with my boss.
Privacy - Surveillance
'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'
"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"
'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'
"We've been cancelled."
'I use the clones to help prevent identity theft.'
"I've dabbled in espionage, but my main area of expertise is self-sabotage."
"Good afternoon, Ted. I'm your online presence."
"We've updated our privacy policy...it's so private we can't even tell you."
Hidden Facebook Features
Bank notes coming out of a safe.
'We have to be forthright with the public. We have to have their confidence. We have to convince them we're working for the common good. Then we can invade their privacy.'
Facial Recognition
'The best way to protect your privacy is through a flood of misinformation obscuring the truth.'
'Our crime figures are down!'
"You are found guilty of privacy, aggravated privacy and the exercise of privacy with intent to conceal."
MI5 Press Office
"Please enter the last 4 digits of your SSN...or enter all 9. They're all over the dark web."
'Don't give me that junk! — We spies don't either have to stick together!'
Information Security
"Welcome to your new home Sire. There isn't an enemy in the land that will penetrate these three foot thick stone walls."
"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"
Liberte, Egalite, Fraternite, Surveillance.
"Yours is the worst case of identity theft I've investigated."
Car robbers foiled by mousetraps surrounding a car.
After a Lot of Hype, Russian Interference Turns Out Not to Amount to Much
No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.
A new case, Ernie...On a lark, two young girls broke into a museum and stole a half-dozen Peter Breugel paintings of Hades. Chicks nick six styx pics for kicks!
Privacy Stops Where the Parking Lot Begins
"I found a partial thumbprint. Let's get the heck out of here"
'I will now peek into your future, David...'
Identity Theft Consultant Pillows Collection
Identity Theft Consultant Mugs
Explore our collection of mugs featuring witty designs perfect for identity theft consultants who start their day with a smile.
Identity Theft Consultant Prints
Browse inspiring prints that honor the expertise and humor of identity theft consultants, great for decorating their workspace.
Identity Theft Consultant T-Shirts
Discover humorous and stylish t-shirts that celebrate the skills and dedication of identity theft consultants.