Identity Theft Buff Pillows

You know what? I think we are victims of identity theft!

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

'All we can do is hope for identity theft.'

'I use the clones to help prevent identity theft.'

"Identity theft hotline? Yes, it's Dracula again. Millions of people are still stealing my identity on Halloween."

"Yours is the worst case of identity theft I've investigated."

Which One is Pulling Out?

'Arnold, blow the whole depot, then hightail it out of here.'

"One of you got online and stole my identity, which is weird because there's not one thing unique about us."

'I'm here due to an identity theft.'

'Well, I don't know anything about 'identity theft'. All I can tell you, is that according to these records you're already here.'

'I say we forget about these particular chickens...'

Man sees his double in ID parade. Policeman says: 'Please indicate which of these men stole your identity.'

'Can I see some ID?' - 'I'm your husband you dope.'

"All right, which one stole your identity?"

"This app encrypts verbal communications. My doctor's handwriting is all we need to encrypt everything else."

An identity thief takes the stand.

"This is the break room, where we watch reruns of classic security footage."

'What's the pass-word?'

"For security, our signs need to be at least eight characters long."

'Do you ever get the feeling that these so called 'stick people' have stolen our identity?'

An early case of identity theft

Ship's Log In: Iris & Finger Print Recognition.

'I've found that poverty helps protect my identity.'

"That's correct, Sir, for one month only a special buy one get one free offer on super injunctions."

"The Johnsons tend to keep themselves to themselves..."

NSA Personnel. Are you a good listener?

If you see something whack something.

"The person who stole my identity is in this city, so look for someone who looks and acts like me."

'It was identity theft by my body double!'

Now in Stock! 25 Million Names and Addresses on a 2 Disk Set.

'We'll try. In the meantime, I can offer you a great deal on a new identity to replace yours.'

'It was really hard for him when somebody stole his identity...but it felt even worse when they gave it back.'

Credit Cards Shredded.

If you're worried about stalkers..