Identity Theft Skeptic Pillows

Credit Cards Shredded.

UK border controls relaxed.

'All we can do is hope for identity theft.'

'I use the clones to help prevent identity theft.'

"Identity theft hotline? Yes, it's Dracula again. Millions of people are still stealing my identity on Halloween."

Your DNA is in the database.

'I'm here due to an identity theft.'

'Well, I don't know anything about 'identity theft'. All I can tell you, is that according to these records you're already here.'

Man sees his double in ID parade. Policeman says: 'Please indicate which of these men stole your identity.'

"That'll keep them out."

This homeland security is getting out of hand.

"All right, which one stole your identity?"

'For your safety, these stalls are monitored by a single person in a discreet location.'

An identity thief takes the stand.

"Dave's away from his desk, I'm afraid. Can I take a message, or read you his browser history."

A man realises surveillance cameras are on him at the urinal.

You know what? I think we are victims of identity theft!

'Do you ever get the feeling that these so called 'stick people' have stolen our identity?'

An early case of identity theft

The Enemies Within? They're the Boys in Blue

"This is nice. But wouldn't you feel safer under video surveillance?"

'I've found that poverty helps protect my identity.'

"My security system sucks."

"I don't mind giving up the appearance of privacy to live with the illusion of safety."

"Email is such a security risk! That's why I prefer good old fashioned one-to-one gossip."

"I don't care if someone is bugging my cell phone, I have no opinions of my own."

So you know my age and that I like Scrabble and that I may at one point have purchased foot cream? Of course. You're on Facebook. It's a terrific way to let the world know who you are. What about my privacy? Your what? Privacy?! Not familiar. Can you spell it?

No Fly/No Gun

Security Questions

'Concerns about our data management are misplaced...our new system is very robust Miss Pettigrew.'

'It was identity theft by my body double!'

"Did you lock all the doors?" "Relax, we live in Vermont." "Later that night..." "Tell me where the honey is and nobody gets hurt."

"The person who stole my identity is in this city, so look for someone who looks and acts like me."

"Passwords? I use the different names I'm called at Starbucks."

'We're a traditional firm...I don't believe in CCTV's'