Identity Sleuth Gifts

"I'll be damned – it's my Social Security number."

'Higgins??! My gosh, someone has stolen your identity!!

'Sure, I can reprogram your microchip if you want to change your identity...'

Identity theft lineup.

'Sir, we need your passport, driver's license, and Facebook name!'

'You've got that silly blank look again George or someone really has stolen your identity this time!'

"Actually those missing four yeas I was working here under a different name."

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

$1: Family Secrets

'It's not for myself, you understand."

When did you first feel like a male trapped in a female body? When I was a foetus.

"Is this who I am?"

Clickbait

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

Christopher Isherwood

"I'm both too liberal to be preppy and too conservative to be trendy."

'We started wearing name tags to rell who's who, unfortunately we all like the name 'Kevin,!'

'What an execrable day. I got drenched in a Wiki leak and buried in a document dump.'

'I'm sorry, Jason. I don't date anyone new until I've googled them.'

'I can't believe an Alligator stole my identity... I mean, it's quite obvious I'm a Crocodile!'

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

"I have a personal blog, therefore I am!"

'Of course I'm depressed. I've run out of places to pierce.'

'It's a sad case -- amnesia AND identity theft.'

Tiger discovers the online wildlife trade.

'Gimme all your cache!'

Forming the adolescent personality

"It's the age-old question of our existence, Bill: 'Why does bad data happen to good computers?'"

"Someone has stolen my identity crisis."

"Adolescencia"

"Hello, I am a Nigerian Prince and I need your help!!! Please send me $500 and your bank routing number. You will rewarded with 10% of 12.7 million dollars and my undying friendship. Best wishes, Prince John Barron."

Secret Service Dogs

Blok conforming, with difficulty.

"Password must contain at least one pictograph."