Ice Warriors Gifts

Bored with retirement, the Great One tries crime.

The Jeopardy of Progress

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

Bees SOS

Hockey Season.

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

"It's trickle down."

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

'It's not for homework. It's for traction.'

'I don't know about the ecosystem, but the economy seems to be on the upswing.'

"It's somehow comforting to witness a revival of the classics in motivational technique."

Ice Fly-Fishing with Doug

'C'mon, guys. That old geezer just leg pressed 400 pounds when he got up from the chair.'

Men playing water football in barrels on a lake

"If you're wondering why you've been chosen 'Employee of the week,' it's because your work load is about to increase, while your pay remains the same."

'Lungs, normal. Heart, normal. Kidneys, normal. For the life of me, I can't figure out where your pain is coming... wait. Do you play hockey?'

Tomorrow's world 2165.

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of dealing with emergency plumbing problems are the hardest.'

A typical Monday. Zombie truck driving maniacs! South Pole penguin love! That's a stupid eco-friendly chick documentary! Insipid, mindless, violent, zombie crud! Negotiations commence, nearly a week before date night. Wimp! Blockbuster head!

Swamp gas

"I'm going in."

Kids playing ice hockey for a medal.

"What do you mean Halloween ISN'T a paid holiday off?!"

'My God! It's Hastings, Van Witten, Rosten and Traver, Inc!'

"You call this ice?"

"I have a very demanding job. The boss is always demanding I work late."

"So what if they notice a stain? Everyone gets tummy aches. Besides, we’re conserving energy."

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

'What it is is a giant kidney.'

"Have you given any thought to legacy and sustainability?"

"Well, we could just tell everyone we have an indoor pool!"

"The chairman said he wanted to see you when you got out of hospital."

Are we at the right stage in life to begin composting?

Australian boffins are using kangaroo stomach bacteria in cows to stop them farting methane! 'Strewth!'