Hypnotist In Training Gifts

Snake Charmer

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

"Can you hypnotise me into being in shape?"

Trilby - 'A voice he didn't understand'.

"Lately, I've been trying to spend less time staring at the glowing orb."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

"Charming, absolutely charming."

"You shouldn't have hypnotised him"

Derren Brown: Pushed to the Edge

Hypnotoon

Vampire Day Job - Hypnotherapist

'And when I snap my fingers you'll be happy with what I pay you.'

"Here's my wallet, my phone, the key to the safe and an application form for your so-called 'mind control device.'"

"No, I'm not asleep, but my foot is."

Margaret got tired of waiting for her ‘slow-brew' tea.

"Not lengthways you idiot!!"

'So what else do you hyptnotise apart from rabbits?'

Wilbert wished he's taken those karate classes instead.

Earl was obviously distressed, as he recounted under hypnosis how aliens had abducted him, and had their tax inspectors thoroughly examine his books.

"That was a fascinating regression. Apparently, you were a pirate in a previous life!"

"I like everything you suggest, except for the part where you count to three to wake me up. Can we just skip that part?"

'And you will stay here until the Andersons' bathroom renovation is finished entirely. You will not leave, not even for a moment...'

Snake charmer hypnotizes aliens in flying saucer

"When you awake you will feel fine, you will have no pain, and... Oh, what the hell... you will cluck like a chicken for ten seconds."

Thanks to hypnosis, he quit smoking cold-turkey. Everyone seemed real supportive until he came strutting into work, half-naked, gobbling incoherently.

"This isn't what I had in mind. . ."

Levitation Man Avoids Angry Husband.

The Hypnotato,

'I don't know what happened in there, Stanley... But I've completely lost the urge to eat. I mean it - I feel stuffed! Supposed to come back right before thanksgiving for a follow-up though.'

'I can see you're going to be a bit of a challenge.'

'... And you say that this hypnotist promised to relax you for this interview? '

Quiet Night

Derren Brown

"I used to think that hypnotherapy was a pseudo-science but Phil has convinced me otherwise."