Humorous Romantics Gifts

"I had no idea a sexless marriage would involve so much reading."

Robocop and Juliet.

You're the botanicals in my gin

'That was close...hit me right in the wallet.'

Sexual chemistry set

"It's over, Martin. I've met someone with bigger cheeks."

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

"Honk if you love me!"

"How barbaric! Females should be wooed by colourful displays, not fighting!"

Tunnel of Like.

'Sorry, but my car is a hybrid and I wouldn't accept anything less in a husband.'

'I'm looking for a card that says if I didn't get you this, I'd never hear the end of it.'

“It’s the only way we can get him to kiss her.”

"I think it was good for me. Was it good for you?"

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

'I love you, Howard, but let's not jump to conclusions.'

'Marry me, and make me the happiest man in the world.' 'You want BOTH?!'

Boy on father's knee

"It's perfect! You're a government redactor, and I'm a broadcast network word bleeper."

Homophone Encounter

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

Dating in 2020

'For the last time, Butchie, I love you but I'm not in love with you.'

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

You're pig-headed, Louis, I like that in a man.

"Or...we could suggest a three-way."

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

"I never turn into a prince on a first date."

Frog Prince holds sign: 'Will work for kisses'.

'I hear they wrote their own vows.'

"Well, hello there yourself!"