Humorous Moments Fan Gifts

Happy Hour

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

The Brothers Grime

10 K Tail-Chase

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

"What the hell took so long?"

The Snooze Bar.

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

Beer Parasol.

'Now, remember...let me do the talking.'

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"Well, you were late and her boyfriend didn't turn up for their wedding, so....."

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

"I fell to the ground from a height of about two metres when I was born: My very first stunt!"

'Joe has been partying hard!'

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

Clown's Cuckoo Clock.

tRUMp, Pirate President

No, I don

Malfunctioning geyser

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"

'It will be a difficult adjustment, but it doesn't mean you can't still live a full and rewarding life, say, in the library, or even a miniature golf course.'

'Bob, wait!!! Nice try, bear.'

Presidential surveillance ass!"

"Fish finder."

Shrewsbury - pronunciation

The bird feeder.

"It worked as you said Mum! I yelled 'LICE' as soon as the lion approached and he stopped in his tracks to scratch his mane while I escaped!"