Humorous Loner Gifts

'Will you be dining alone tonight, Sir?'

Club Antisocial

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

'Maybe we should talk to him more, Malcolm.'

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"This isn't working out, Henry...I'm a social butterfly and you're just an annoying little moth!"

Your own tedious thoughts next 200 miles

"I am having an alternative Christmas."

"Or, is it the perfect beach day because there's no one here to p*** us off?"

Quiet night? Liven up that game of solitaire with a Mexican wave.

"I like sad songs."

"Have you been here long?"

'Dear diary, went to the beach again today.'

Man thinking it's safer driving a tank

'Just because I'm eating alone doesn't mean you should suggest the 'loser' special. But I'll take it.'

'... and with the advent of Email, fax machines, cellphones and Blackberry's, more and more executives are working from home.'

"I just can’t stand the loneliness anymore."

"A lot of people say that my absence is my best feature."

Get home. No one there. Oh, the joy of the house to myself!

Meet the publisher's entire marketing dept. 2-4pm

Christmas during a pandemic.

'Looks like Harvey's entered his holiday mode.'

"No single, childless adult with very little family and only one friend can possibly get that many Christmas gifts."

Castaways Not Welcome

Jobs that will make you really lonely...

'I know living on an abandoned nuclear test site has its advantages - no bugs, no snakes, no univited guests but did it ever occur to you that there's nothing else here either?'

'I'm nobody's best friend, I'm an Indie.'

A prisoner pulls out his heart.

Lonely Christmas Cow

Man pulling a cracker by himself with a palm tree.

'Cedric always felt anonymous.'

'Stop acting lonelier-than-thou.'

Car has 'Just biding my time' written across the back as single man drives.